10 minutes ago
“Time doesn’t exist. Clocks exist. Nothing actually exists. Your body simply houses a soul, run by a three pound brain. You are simply a mind. Where is your mind exactly? It feels like it’s in your head. When you think about it, you can almost feel your thoughts happening. When you walk, it’s just piloting. Nothing is real. Other people view you as someone completely different as you view yourself. You know all those times when you temporarily fall in love with someone on the bus or train? How beautiful or handsome they seem, hair lightly falling over their eyes, or maybe they have short hair or are bald. But something about them beckons yourself to them, and you want to hold them tightly. And then they get off, and you feel like you have been ripped in two. You’ve been that person for many. That person who they’re planning, “at this stop.. I’ll say hello.” And then you leave.
People have most likely cried over you, in their bed, head buried into their pillow. Or they have thought of you in the car on a long drive to the doctors or to their grandparents house, looking out the window, wondering what it’d be like for you to be driving, one hand off the wheel to hold yours.
All of that has happened. And the next time you mumble to yourself, “No one will ever love me”, simply remember, people already have.”
— idk something i wrote at 12:52am